


The Merc with the Mouth talks some sense into Arrow Season 5

by Bl4ckHunter



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Deadpool - All Media Types
Genre: Crack Fic, Fix-it to Season 5, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 22:51:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17907179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bl4ckHunter/pseuds/Bl4ckHunter
Summary: Crack fic one-shot story. The notorious Merc with the Mouth fixes the gigantic mess in Arrow Season 5.





	The Merc with the Mouth talks some sense into Arrow Season 5

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Aragorn_II_Elessar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aragorn_II_Elessar/gifts).



> Author's Note and Disclaimer:
> 
> An idea that hit me when re-watching Deadpool 2 and reading Aragorn II Elessar's various "Deadpool goes into other universes calling people out" fics.
> 
> I do not own Marvel Comics, Deadpool, DC Comics or the CW TV shows Arrow, The Flash, Legends of Tomorrow, Supergirl or any other characters or elements pertaining to the mentioned franchises.

Chase was sitting and leaning onto the wall, enjoying that he broke Oliver and managed to convince him of destroying everything around him because he is nothing but a murderer. "How does it feel, knowing that I saw the one thing you couldn't admit to yourself?"

"I knew he'd break. Just like you said he would." Evelyn taunted.

"That's because I know him better than he knows himself. Give us a moment alone, will you?" Chase said as Evelyn left the cell, leaving Chase and Oliver alone.

"I told you, Oliver, you infect every life you touch. And now do you realize why? It's because your crusade was based on a lie. You used your father's memory to justify a killing spree. There's a price to be paid for that, Oliver. Your mother paid it. Your friend Tommy paid it. Laurel. Do you really want to tell me that John Diggle's and Felicity Smoak's lives are better having known you?" Chase taunted as Oliver was lying on the floor, devastated.

"You seriously think you know him better than he knows himself, do you, asshole?" A new cracking voice taunted as both Oliver and Chase had puzzled looks on their faces.

"Who the heck..."

"Oh, the hypocritical recruit. I'll deal with you too, later." The voice said before there was a sound of 'smack' and someone collapsing on the ground. Then, into the cell entered a man in red and black spandex suit with black spots around his eyes, with two katanas on his back and a belt with two holstered pistols on his waist and grenades on a belt on his chest.

"Who the hell are you?" Chase demanded as he got up. "And how did you find this place? And what did you do to Evelyn?"

"Oh, I thought you'd know, since you're 10 steps ahead, smartass." The man in the costume said. "Oh, but since you don't know, I probably should introduce myself. I'm Wade Wilson but you can call me "Deadpool". BTW, Evelyn's knocked out." For some reason, Oliver laughed softly, since the name almost reminded him of his former friend Slade. "And I'm here to fix what Guggenheim and Mericle are doing by trying to portray Oliver as a monster and a serial killer."

"That's exactly what he is." Chase said, although the names "Guggenheim" and "Mericle" were lost to him.

"Really? Serial killers have a pattern and are psychopaths with no remorse. Pattern? The List. Remorse, Ollie has it, therefore, that does not make him a monster." Wade taunted. "Unlike you. You were a sick psychopath since childhood."

"How dare you..." Chase fumed with rage.

"You blame Oliver for the death of your father but also of deaths of Laurel, Tommy and his mother. Well..." Deadpool trailed off. "For reminder, Justin Claybourne poisoned Lamb Valley with tuberculosis and Oliver gave him a chance to fix it. Did he listen? No. Also, it may have reminded Oliver of General Shrieve's scheme in Hong Kong. So I don't think you can really fault Ollie for killing your old man and the people that were protecting him. For reminder, he was a greedy scumbag, just like Shrieve." Deadpool said and Adrian fumed in rage at the intruder mocking his mission and justifying Oliver's actions as much as Evelyn. "Oliver may be a killer but at least he has remorse and he has never killed unless he had no choice left or was provoked. How many people has Oliver actually killed in the first year, asides from multiple thugs and guards who gave him no choice left and he killed them only to stay alive?" Wade then seemed to be lost in thoughts.

"Let's see... Leo Muller, a German weapons dealer who sold guns in the Glades, Oliver had given him a chance to bail from the town.

Ted Gaynor was going to kill Oliver's friend John Diggle before Oliver put an arrow in his chest too.

Guillermo Barrera, an assassin that Oliver had to kill in self-defense.

And your old man, Claybourne, used weaponized tuberculosis, to kill countless families, all for an expensive profit for his cure, something like Shrieve did and Hideo Yamane, a drug dealer, who came from Starling in Russia, who contributed to the Undertaking.

Are those actions of a monster and a serial killer? The way I see it, they gave Oliver no choice. Tell me, Ollie..." Deadpool turned to Oliver. "Did you enjoy killing them?"

Oliver took a breath, trying to remember. "No... but they gave me no other choice left."

Deadpool smiled as he turned to Chase. "See, Oliver may be a killer but he's not a serial killer. He had no other choice."

Chase's face turned red as the unknown intruder was foiling his mission to make Oliver suffer and convince him he's a monster that enjoys killing but there was still one card Chase had left to play.

"It doesn't matter. Because of Oliver's sins, everyone around him suffers. Everyone he loves, dies because of what he did." Chase taunted. "Shado, Tommy, Moira, Laurel..."

"You know what, I'm gonna stop you right there, Junior." Wade interrupted him and Chase, for some reason, stopped as he wanted to see how would Wade try to rebuff this. "You know, Josh Segarra makes an amazing villain but I'd like to see him melt down from this."

This time, neither Chase or Oliver had any clue what the hell was Deadpool talking about as they both looked at him like if he was crazy.

"OK, you blame Ollie for the deaths of those he cares about. OK, let's recap. Ivo gave Oliver a choice to decide whether Shado or Sara live or die." Deadpool reminded and Oliver could feel more guilt crush him.

Chase smiled vindictively. "And Oliver chose to let Shado..."

"Uh-uh. The way I see it, it was psychological warfare." Wade said. "Shado and Slade were more experienced and skilled than Oliver." Both Adrian and Oliver were completely confused. "If I recall, the pirates almost whooped your ass, didn't they and Slade and Shado did beat them better than you." He turned to Oliver, who blushed in embarrassment. "Ivo killed the biggedy threat at the moment and wanted to convince Oliver that it was his fault. The way I see it, Ivo is to blame, since he knew Oliver would choose whoever Ivo would point the gun at and he calculated it to make it seem like Oliver chose Shado to die. So, is Oliver really to blame? I think not, considering Ivo was a calculating psychopath. He would have killed her anyway."

Adrian fumed with rage and Oliver considered whether there was a point in blaming himself over Shado's death.

"And also, Tommy, Moira and Laurel. Tommy made his choice to save Laurel during the Undertaking. It wasn't really Oliver's fault he died. How could he have known Malcolm had two earthquake machines?" Wade pointed out and Oliver considered, knowing Wade had a point. "Moira made a choice to protect her children and she sacrificed herself to let them live, just like Robert did." He reminded. "Oliver isn't responsible for choices of others. And Laurel... well, I blame the most Guggenheim for this biggest mistake to kill off the Green Arrow's love interest and also Mr. John Diggle for being an idiot for trusting Andy, who obviously was working for Darhk. What a shitty writing from Guggenheim and Mericle."

Oliver again considered his own part in the deaths of the people he loved, although the names "Guggenheim" and "Mericle" were lost to both him and and Chase.

"Oliver is not a monster, he is a hero this city needs. He's done what the cops and courts could not do. He risks his life every day to make the lives of innocents better. He never killed an innocent, unlike you..." Deadpool glared at Adrian. "You commited far more heinous and horrible actions than what you accuse Oliver of, such as killing innocent people to taunt Oliver and remind him of the people he had hunted down, your own wife included. You're nothing but a psychopath and hypocrite."

Seeing the return of confidence in Oliver's face, Chase's face turned red in relentless rage as he threw a murderous glare at the man in red spandex. "I won't let a clown mock everything I've worked for in four years! I will avenge my father..."

"It's funny about you trying to honor your old man's legacy. If you only knew..." Deadpool taunted and Adrian had a puzzled look on his face once more.

"What are you talking about?" Adrian demanded. "What are you talking about?! What's so funny about my father's legacy?!" He yelled angrily.

"Oh, you don't know?" Deadpool taunted. "Oh, boo-hoo, what a pathetic loser you are. Your old man was going to disown you and not because you were an illegitimate son but because you're a sick psychopath. I find it pathetic. You're trying to avenge your old man, who's ashamed of you and like a hypocrite, you commit far more horrible actions than Oliver, mocking Oliver for killing bad guys, when he had no choice left, when you killed innocent people, your own wife included."

Chase's lips quivered as he seemed to be on verge of a breakdown. "Oh, what's the matter, Junior, are you gonna cry?" Suddenly, he punched Chase in the face as he staggered back and closed his eyes, unconscious as he slumped to the floor, with his head leaning onto the wall.

Oliver sighed in relief. "I don't know who you are... but thank you. You... you made some good points there. I had convinced myself I was a monster... but you helped me find my way."

"Good. You're a hero who does what has to be done. Remember that, Ollie." Deadpool said. "And BTW, stop blaming yourself for what happened. You know why your past keeps coming back to haunt you?" Oliver considered but found no answer. "Because you keep blaming yourself for what happened with your Dad and everything bad that has happened since then. Seriously, don't. Blaming yourself doesn't help. You need to let go, man. Otherwise your past is gonna hold you back forever."

Oliver considered Wade's advice before they both considered what to do with unconscious Chase and Evelyn and how to track down Talia.

Evelyn slowly came to as Deadpool suddenly pinned her hands to a wall with two knives as she screamed in pain. "Oh, look who woke up."

"I don't know who are you, clown but..."

"I'm here to talk some sense into you. You blame Oliver for your parents and you call him a monster, when you side yourself with a man, who has killed dozens of innocent, his own wife included and Oliver didn't kill anyone, who didn't have it coming and he killed only when he had no other choice left. Who's the hypocrite here?"

Evelyn sneered angrily, unaffected before Wade smirked. "Your parents would turn themselves in their graves if they saw what you did."

Evelyn screamed angrily before Wade headbutted her, knocking her out.

"Wow, that makes me relieved." He then turned to Oliver. "You should talk to Fefe about what was she thinking about recruiting her.”

Oliver agreed, knowing Wade had a point, although he didn't like him mocking Felicity's name like that.

* * *

Later, in the lair, everyone was worried about Oliver before they heard the door open and were relieved to see Oliver but then, Diggle, Felicity and Curtis were confused to see him leaning onto a man in red spandex suit. "Oliver, what the..." Diggle trailed off.

"Don't worry, I brought your best buddy Ollie back home safe and Chase is rotting in ARGUS cell." Wade said.

"OK, not that we don't appreciate your help, mister but... who are you?" Felicity asked, in a not so polite tone, considering that someone managed to help Oliver before the Team Arrow could.

"The name's Wade Wilson." Wade said. "And I came here to fix up the massive clusterfuck that Season 5 had become." Oliver sat down, tired from his injuries. "You see, Chase tried to convince Oliver he's a monster that enjoys killing."

"That's ridiculous." Diggle protested and Felicity and Curtis nodded in agreement.

"From you, I buy it, Johnny boy, but as for you..." Wade glared at Felicity and Curtis, who were now annoyed by Wade's glare. "If I recall, you two condemned Oliver as a monster immediately."

"Excuse me?!" Felicity demanded, offended. "Just who the hell do you think..."

"Ken Williams. Rings a bell?" Wade reminded and Felicity flushed in embarrassment. "You tried to stop Oliver from teaching him a lesson since the guy ripped good people, just because he had a little boy."

Felicity tried to justify. "I thought Oliver was gonna kill..."

"See, there's that issue. You automatically condemned Oliver for being a killer, from what you've heard from the news, not that I blame you but considering the good the Hood had done for this city, how many people has he actually killed? Did that really make him a serial killer? Besides, Williams having a son makes what he did, so much better, when he ripped good people off their money. What if it was Claybourne? Would you have stopped Oliver from going after him, when Claybourne poisoned hundreds of innocents for money? It's not like Oliver has killed every guy he faced." Wade reminded and Felicity looked down in shame and embarrassment. Then he turned to Curtis. "And you condemned Oliver for being a serial killer too. If you don't know, Oliver tried to help Helena Bertinelli from her path of revenge and tried to help Garfield Lynns rehabilitate, despite how many people have both of them killed, out of grief and revenge. Does that sound like actions of a serial killer?"

Felicity and Curtis both had the decency to look ashamed.

"Plus, the "no killing rule", that was your idea and because of it, Laurel, the Black Canary, got killed. And you have a blame in it too, Mr. Diggle." Wade turned to Diggle and he seethed in rage.

"What?" Diggle growled, keeping his tone leveled and his face partly filled with shame and with rage.

"The blind spot for family. Your little bro was obviously working for Darhk and you didn't listen to Oliver's suspicions and what happened?" Wade reminded and Diggle looked down in shame at remembering his own unintentional role in Laurel's death.

"And you, Fefe. You should understand that Oliver had no choice in the William matter and what could you have done?" Wade turned to Felicity. "Besides, you're not the kid's parent, unlike Oliver or Samantha, so wife or not, it gives you no right to decide about his life whatsoever. And because you decided that your grudge with Oliver was more important than the entire city and mission and maybe if you had stayed, Laurel, the real Laurel, may have lived, if you all stood together and YOU had kept your feelings in check. You always show your grudge with Oliver during the mission, which always compromises it. Someone, who can't keep their feelings in check has no place in the team."

Felicity looked down in shame and guilt, realizing Wade was right about that matter. "Also, you ordered the recruits to take out Black Siren, when it wasn't your call to make."

Felicity's face turned red in rage. "She had something in her..."

"It was a phone, you dolt!" Wade snapped.

"And how was I supposed to know that?!" Felicity demanded, her face turning red in relentless rage.

"Actually..." Oliver cleared his throat. "You couldn't have and you had no authority to order the teammates to attack her. There's a chain of command in the field and you are not in it! I am in charge! You are a tech support and nothing more."

"And suckerpunching Laurel is such ridiculous bullshit. And honestly, considering that she survived a speeding car, one punch should really be nothing. You do realize that because of your grudge, she might kill you if she gets out." Wade said.

Felicity flushed in embarrassment.

Wade turned to Diggle.

"But the biggest blame regarding Laurel goes to Mr. Diggle. Trusting your brother for..."

"There's nothing you can say about my role in Laurel's death that I haven't already said to myself." Diggle said calmly. "I know I'm to blame and I made my peace with that."

"And you do realize how much of a hypocrite you are, do you?" Wade said.

"Excuse me?" Diggle snapped.

"Accusing Oliver of having blind spot for his family and Laurel, when you have a chockful of blind spots. Ted Gaynor. Andy. Fefe. And what about judging Lyla for Cayden J..." Then he trailed off. "Never mind."

"Cayden who?" Felicity asked, not understanding.

"You know what, technically, Chase and Evelyn are in ARGUS custody, so... all I say is, stay away from Helix before things get worse because your association with these hacktivist idiots turned Season 6, the year 2017-2018, into clusterfuck! So, I suggest you all think about yourselves very deeply. And I think I'm gonna beat some sense into Guggenheim and Mericle for their shitty writing and trying to keep making Oliver the ultimate villain here. See ya!" Wade suddenly vanished with a "poof", leaving behind a cloud of smoke, leaving everyone puzzled and confused at what the hell just happened and who were Guggenheim and Mericle that Wade talked about. Diggle and Felicity considering deeply their past actions and Oliver considered whether he should visit Laurel in ARGUS custody and try to reach her and he was more and more convinced about his crusade than ever before and Oliver considering how to track down Talia before she would help Chase escape and he thought of Nyssa and Sara coming to help take her down.

* * *

Talia al Ghul was planning to break Adrian out before her phone rang as she picked it up, confused that an unknown caller was calling her as she answered the call. "Hello?"

"Hey. Lady. You should know, I find it pathetic that you're trying to avenge a man, who never had any love for you or your sister." Wade mocked over the phone. "First of all, Ra's al Ghul never showed any affection to either of you and he'd never avenge you for love but only for the sake of the duty to the League. So I find your love to the man incapable of loving his own daughters and the quest for revenge quite pathetic, since you know what Ra's planned to do and also, you siding with the son of a man, who was on a list that you convinced Oliver to target, to get revenge on Oliver, I find that very hypocritical. But don't worry. Because I will look for you. I will find you. And I will kill you.

See you soon, bitch." Wade finished, hanging up and Talia seethed in rage at the unknown man taunting and mocking her quest, vowing to make him suffer.

Suddenly... BANG! Blood spattered on the ground, with a hole in Talia's forehead as she collapsed to the ground with a glassy look as Wade holstered his gun from which was smoking.

* * *

Marc Guggenheim and Wendy Mericle were in a studio, writing a script for  _ **Arrow Season 6**_ before they sniffed something. "Is that gasoline?" Mericle asked.

* * *

KABOOM!

An explosion blew up the building in which Guggenheim and Mericle were as Wade dropped the detonator.

"And that is how  _ **Arrow**  _should have been fixed. And now... how do I fix _ **The Flash**_?" Deadpool wondered.

**Author's Note:**

> The idea hit me, when watching Deadpool 2 and reading Aragon II Elessar's various "Deadpool intervenes into other fandoms" fics and I myself enjoyed writing it. The 4th wall breaking stuff and catching Wade's humor, when writing, is always tricky though, I hope I did a good job.
> 
> The line "I will look for you. I will find you. And I will kill you." is from Taken (2008 film), which Bryan Mills, played by Liam Neeson, said and you can see the irony, since Liam Neeson played Ra's al Ghul in Nolanverse The Dark Knight Trilogy.
> 
> Please review and let me know if you have enjoyed this one-shot.
> 
> With regards
> 
> Bl4ckHunter


End file.
